When is okay to blame your parents?
Coach Josh here at Training for Warriors Portland and I have a story to share with you today. This is a joke I got from a movie a few years ago and it cracked me up! It goes something like this.
The Russian prime minister is about to be impeached during a tumultuous period in his administration. A new PM is elected and meets the old PM who greets him and says:
"Look, it's a very difficult time for Russia right now. I know you have the strength to lead. HOWEVER, if things get really, really bad, and the people turn on you, I have left two letters in your desk. Take out the first letter and read it. It will give you instructions on exactly what to do to turn things around. If things continue to go badly, read the second letter and it will also give you additional instructions. I wish you the best of luck. I know you're gonna take care of our country."
The old prime minister vacates the office and the new PM has a honeymoon period with the people of Russia. He's going to end the corruption and TURN THINGS AROUND.
A year goes by and sure enough, people are pissed again. There is still corruption and crime, the people are still suffering and being oppressed by the rich and powerful. They start to blame him and his administration. This guy isn't very politically savvy and hasn't been around the block as much as the previous prime minister. So he cracks open that letter... because what does he have to lose???
The letter says, "If you're reading this, things are going poorly and you're losing public favor. To regain their trust and get them on your side, I want you to take all of the problems that they are complaining about and blame me and my administration."
The prime minister goes and gives a big speech about how terrible the last administration was, how he will take care of things, and how he's going to turn things around. BOOM. Public opinion is back on his side. They have someone to hate on; the current prime minister knows it and he's gonna fix the problems. Great!
Another year goes by and the problems aren't fixed. In fact, the people are angrier than before. The PM is stressed and says, "Well, the first letter helped me out. Let's see what the second letter says." He cracks open that letter and it says, "If you're reading this, things are continuing to go poorly. I want you to sit down and write two letters."
The moral of the story is your scapegoats aren't gonna be around forever. Whether it's your boss, parents, or anybody else in your life, you can't always blame them. At the end of the day, the responsibility for getting you where you want to go lies with you. For this metaphor, I often think about parents and how it's really convenient to blame them for our:
lack of ability to process emotions
why we're so bad in the kitchen
poor money management because we never talked about it,
and so forth.
That may all be true. We initially learn everything from our parents. Until you integrate role models and have new scripts, that's all you have. But you can really only blame them one time, because once you figure out that which you don't know, who's in charge?
I hope that story made you smile and I hope you're ready to take some responsibility. When you do, things will get awesome. This is Coach Josh at Training for Warriors Portland, helping you bring out the warrior within.